on telling the truth and the beauty of boundaries (and freedom from inspiration and vulnerability porn.)

telling our truth can be liberating, no longer hiding behind shame and
knowing the freedom of refusing to participate in the required silencing.
it feels really good, to speak what we want and choose, to own our stories.
it can be magnificent when our life marries imagination and creates art.
community organizing and activism is fed and grown through activating our own narratives and understanding how publicly sharing them brings us awake to the work to be done.

and…
you don't owe your story to anyone.
your life is not a product of inspiration to be consumed. (you are far too complex and nuanced and beautiful for that).
telling our story in order to be perceived as wide open and vulnerable can end up feeling damaging.
not sharing things and choosing instead to allow them to remain private and nourish the interior creative life is not being "closed" but can rather be exquisite self containment and love, being our own home to return to.

we are surrounded by images that say "i'm so amazing. come be like me."
and then there is the vulnerability inspiration porn that says "i'm so exposed. i'm just like you."
and both end up feeling really off.

the truth is,
i'm not just like you.
because i'm me.
and you are you.
and as humans, we all have our own private and public stories, and we need each other.

you can be real and still keep things private. you can write down the bones and let words open windows to the centers of our stories, even the terrifying and the honor and the mysteries. and you get to have some things that only the smallest number of people will ever know and hold, because they are sacred this way.

vulnerability in our intimacies is sometimes the deepest healing and unexpected service.
boundaries are beautiful.
choosing your own terms of engagement, your yes and no, your public and private, your voice in all its range,
is powerful.
because your life matters, and it belongs to you.