I work individually with those who want to explore and receive support in their lives as they reclaim their own agency and embrace staying human.
This is often related to intimate lives and sexuality, religious and spiritual abuse and meaning making as we thrash in the shadows left by the gods once believed in or seek to name new gods. Sometimes it is the intersection of these two together. I also work one on one with those preparing for childbirth or supporting the dying of one they love, who are sick or live with chronic illness and wrestling with what consent means in the face of all we cannot control as live in these corporeal bodies and stay here with our human selves.
Sometimes, we wake up and look around and it is like we are in the middle of a story we don’t remember starting, all the vows we broke and all the self-betrayals inside and all the questions that came when what we believed began to go up in smoke, and yet we lit the match with our hand.
We want to cease the war inside.
We need sanctuary. We are deserving of Sanctuary.
For the past fifteen years I have worked as a birth doula and death midwife, walking with those crossing thresholds, wrestling with the unanswerable questions and seeking to find meaning in messy humanity and art and a living mythology. My life's work informs the presence I bring to Sanctuary Sessions: the experience of a doula; the devotion of a writer and the real life beauty and vulnerability of sex education; dance and movement workshop facilitation; medical anthropology and hospice work; activism and advocacy with the fervor of a radical; and the quiet of a Quaker tradition in spiritual discernment; deep love for shadow work and reclaiming our once abandoned selves to no longer live divided inside.
The Sanctuary offered comes both from the solid ground of a body of work that arises from walking the path that is my own, and from the intimacy of one who has entered into those experiences in life where you swear you won’t survive, except you do. And you come out the other side knowing both things are true - you made it through and you can’t ever be the same again. And so I offer, to you, safe landing, amnesty, refuge, revelation in radical love. This is not counseling, medical treatment or psychotherapy, all of which I support with a hearty yes and believe in. But that is not what I offer, or what Sanctuary is. Sanctuary is trauma informed and anti-oppression framework consent culture based midwifery and companioning where we come together to sit in the space between the in-between. You can read here, to learn more of my orientation, ways of practice, and what informs my work.
The truth is that no one can walk for you, or have the sovereign authority as to what your own walk might be. No one can give birth for you or die for you or make the decisions that will change everything. No one can inhabit your body for you, live your life for you. And yet, what I am saying is: you don’t have to walk it all alone. I will come walk with you, alongside you, as you enter in, wrestle with angels and demons, fall in love and grieve true. I will walk with you, alongside you, as you ask your questions and show up present for your own life and find your way through to the other side.
The vast majority of "helping" has come to mean interference, utilizing oppressive authoritarian models and forms of saviorism that deny us our own knowing, body trust and integrity. Sanctuary is a space where you you are heard, believed, and companioned, without interference and assumption of insight. I believe you are allowed to have all of you, and the wholeness of your own lived experience, without being gaslit and told you ought to transform it or become a good survivor. I believe your own experience is trustworthy and your own human self worthy of honror and dignity and compassion.